Our “Your Stories” series are submissions shared with us via email or in one-on-one interviews, for the purposes of our research and campaigns. All names have been changed (unless the use of real names was explicitly permitted by the author), and we have sought permission to publish from the authors/interviewees themselves. The opinions expressed in these posts do not represent those of AWARE.

Isabelle: I’m a 36-year-old single mum with a 13-year-old child. I got divorced a few years back.

I don’t have many childhood memories. My mum didn’t care about me and my dad was very strict to me. I’ve been working from the age of 14 until now, struggling by myself to be independent.

I used to consume drugs. When I was 21, I met my (now-ex) hubby. After dating for two years, I got pregnant. I decided to stop taking drugs as I knew it would harm my child, but my ex-hubby continued with his drugs. After our child was born, I thought life would be better. But I was wrong. Almost every day I lived in a nightmare.

I brought up my child with my bare hands. I worked at least three jobs, from day to night, just to survive and provide my child with milk powder and Pampers. While I was at work, my ex-hubby looked after my child. He would bring her wherever he went to carry out his illegal activities.

I remember when Lehman Brothers collapsed in 2008. So many people were jobless—and I was one of them, after getting retrenched. I was forced to take on a dishwasher/stall helper job with a salary of $4 an hour. Almost every day, I carried my child behind me to work, not wanting to leave her alone with my ex-hubby.

I had no family support; neither was my hubby’s family helping. His mother looked down on me and laughed, saying that I was so young, yet working an “auntie job”. I endured the pain and bit my lips to hold on the marriage.

When I got my rental flat, we moved out of his family’s home. Again, I thought things would change for the better, but again I was disappointed. He never changed. Instead, he got more and more into drugs. Every day, different people were staying in our house, doing drugs. The whole house stank. It was really unhealthy for us. Finally, he got caught and went to prison.

When he was released, I gave him another chance for the sake of our child. I got pregnant for the second time. Once again, I pinned my hopes on him changing; once again, he didn’t. He blamed me for the pregnancy, said the child was not his. He insulted me and said all kinds of nasty words.

My second pregnancy ended in a stillbirth. My husband never felt any remorse. It took two years for me to overcome the loss of this child. From there, our marriage was on the rocks. He has been in and out of prison. I lost my job. My elder child is undergoing counselling.

Eventually, I gave up on him and I decided to divorce. It was not easy for me to move on, but this is my struggle in life.